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Funny Quotes and Sayings Engraved in Stone
Laughter is the Best Medicine

This is Not Funny
Did you know that humor actually boosts the immune system? Doctors report, and scientific studies confirm, that laughter can genuinely ease pain and alleviate stress. It is a whole lot cheaper than pharmaceutical medicines and the side effects are wonderful and contagious. When you laugh with your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife, your relationship will improve. Guaranteed!

Laughter is an Instant Vacation
Listen, I'm not here to tell you that a good belly laugh is better than a trip to Hawaii, but it is better than a trip to the doctors. While not all diseases can be cured with a laugh out loud funny joke, anything that can lower your blood pressure and release endorphins is definitely a good thing!
What Makes You Laugh?
Funny is subjective. One person might laugh at someone slipping on a banana peel while another person thinks it is just stupid. Somebody might think that a lampshade on the head is funny but that is probably only the drunk guy who puts it on his own head at a party to which he will never be invited to again. Know your audience. When you give an engraved rock with a funny saying on it, make sure you know what will make that person laugh. Political humor is risky. You might end up with a rock on your head.

The Shameless Sales Pitch
Buy an engraved rock. Buy it now. Make someone laugh. Pull somebody out of their doldrums. Help your brother-in-law forget for a moment that you still owe him money. Fill out the order form and put my kids through college. That wasn't so hard now, was it?

 Order Your Engraved Granite or Engraved River Rock Here: 
    X-LARGE ENGRAVED GRANITE SLAB
    LARGE ENGRAVED GRANITE STONE
    Price:
    $160.00
    This Large granite is 13" in length and approximately an inch thick. The Large size allows for maximum verbiage and depth of carving. Width varies depending on design.
    LARGE ENGRAVED GRANITE SLAB
    MEDIUM ENGRAVED GRANITE STONE
    Price:
    $130.00
    This Medium granite stone is 11" in length and approximately an inch thick. Width varies depending on design.
    SMALL ENGRAVED GRANITE SLAB
    SMALL ENGRAVED GRANITE STONE
    Price:
    $90.00
    This small granite stone is 8" in length and approximately an inch thick.  Width varies depending on design.
    MEDIUM ENGRAVED GRANITE SLAB
    BRASS METAL STAND FOR DISPLAY
    Price:
    $10.00
    If you would like to display your engraved granite inside, we carry this brass metal stand for your display.
      LARGE ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      LARGE ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      Price:
      $160.00
      Because river rocks come in so many shapes and sizes, the dimensions will largely depend on the design. The large river rocks range between 20 to 28 pounds. They are typically around a foot in length but can vary due to the irregular shapes. The large rocks allow for greater creativity due to the larger "canvas".
      MEDIUM ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      MEDIUM ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      Price:
      $130.00
      The medium river rocks weigh between 14 and 16 pounds and are usually about 9 or 10 inches in length. The shape will be determined by the design.
      SMALL ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      SMALL ENGRAVED RIVER ROCK
      Price:
      $90.00
      The small river rocks weigh between 8 and 10 pounds and are about 7 to 8 inches in length.
      SURROUNDING ENGRAVED RIVER ROCKS
      ENGRAVED SIGNATURE ROCKS
      Price:
      $40.00
      Signature rocks are about 4 to 5 inches long and weigh a pound or two and are big enough for a word or two. If they are ordered on their own then the price is $40 each. If they are ordered as rocks surrounding a large river rock then the price is half that, $20 each.
         Humor Quotes Examples 

        It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.

         

        I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

         

        You can't have everything - where would you put it?  

         

        Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.  

         

        Money talks but all mine ever says is "goodbye."  

         

        If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why isn't it #1? 

         

        He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

         

        Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
        For those who need a good laugh or a bit more humor in their lives, give the gift of laughter engraved in stone to a good friend. These humorous engraved rocks will brighten someone's day. I can also add a graphic to your engraved stone to go along with your favorite one-liner.

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        Engraved-Rock.com
        2169 39th Street
        Washougal, WA 98671